I just feel like curling up in a bed and sleep

and pretend that nothing exists, or matters. 

Moved (: 

That is much easier said than done.

"There'll be no comps during graces". By right, that sms would've had made my day. But no, what follows was "RO still wants to go for trainings".

>:(

“What I must do is all that concerns me, not what the people think. This rule, equally arduous in actual and intellectual life, may serve for the whole distinction between greatness and meanness. It is the harder, because you will always find those who think they know what is your duty better than you know it. It is easy in the world to live after the world’s opinion; it is easy in solitude to live after our own; but the great person is one who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude.”

Fever came back so I decided to rest at home for the day. Caught part of oscars in the morning  (I woke up at 11) and sleep through most of the day away :}
I think I'm grown a habit of complaining about school, or projects to be exact. No, I'm not complaining about anyone this time bcus everyone's trying their best. It's just that projects, in general, are annoying. They take up so much time and the weightage of the marks is not say that much, when you compare it to eoys. Seriously, the amount of time spent on completing the projects is almost equivalent to those that I spent studying for eoys. Anw like I've alr said, I shall stop grumbling and get down to work.
Chinese SIA presentation script, here I come.

I think my forte is hurting people.

I've made a decision not to get annoyed/pissed/angry/ at any thing related to schoolwork anymore. Being pissed doesn't make the solution clearer, it just wastes my energy and time. So, I should just make good use of my time and do the work (: 
Anw i feel so relaxed (and guilty) about bio presentation, other than it not being graded. It's the first proj in a year & half which I havent been in charge/compile so I felt so happy just doing my part. But I did offer to help wandong if she needs help later on when compiling since I know that sometimes a simple task can turn out to be rly annoying. Haha I havent felt so saint-like in ages :}

On the brighter note, both NYTT C and B div got first for zonals ! Well done ! <3
(Will upload the pics once I get them from ruio. )

I think I do have an attitude problem. My attitude towards people for the past few days really sucked, to the extent that even I can't stand it myself. It's just like how you still end up making a decision which you know that you're bound to regret. Being annoyed and snapping at others is obviously not the solution but I still did it.

But it is really infuriating. For eg, project work. Some people tell you that they don't know how to do their part and ends up having you to do everything. The thing is, Idk what they dont actually know. What we're doing in projects is the same as our school work. So, they're telling me that they even dont know how to do their schoolwork ? Yeah right. They did not fare that badly in those subjects, worse come to worse. And please, if they're stupid they wouldnt even be in nanyang. Seriously, this is ridiculous. Sometime, I cant help but feel that they are just pushing the work to me. They knew that I would definitely edit the work so why not just do a sub-standard work and let me edit. But if their work hadnt been sub-standard in the first place, I wouldnt even edit/change it. Maybe they did try their best, just that I didnt see it.
It just feels so fucking unfair when others are getting the same marks when you did 3/4 of the work.

Besides, nothing will change. Vnc complained about proj for the pupil welfare scheme last year and nothing came out of it. Maybe I should secretly be glad that bio sia is done alone (except for the fact that the topics sucks).

credits to yingxiang.
This was how YingXiang & I kept ourselves awake on thur night/fri morning.

I really wonder why I'm bothering to do all this. Somtimes I really want t heck and give up. But that would kill my grades, horribly. As much as I want to stop, I wouldnt. It's always the same cycle.
The thing is , I dont even know why I'm so fucking busy. It's not like I have a lot of commitments (compared to some people). Or maybe, I do know why.
Maybe a certain person is right, I should just give others a chance and trust whatever they've send me.

Korean fans (+ china fans) are damn lucky. There's this system by SM where they can send messages to their idols via sms/online, the idols can choose certain messages to reply. Changmin's replies (behind lj cut) totally makes my day x) Mel & I laughed for hours over it last night.


( Changmin & his sacarstic replies x} )